I brought the Bear and Werewolf to their first dance class. There are now three boys and seven or eight girls (and there are now four kids whose parents don’t speak Russian in the home )–it’s funny because even two levels up, the numbers even out. Anyhow, the instructor’s already earmarked a partner for him. They’ll be so cute together! Of course, the Bear is shorter than all but one of the girls.

We should probably stop being so lazy and learn Russian one of these days…. Right now, I know only a couple dozen words. Pretty sad.

The best way to get a good deal on clothes is to decide how much you’ll spend before you go into the store.

For me, I will spend up to:

$10 on casual shirt
$20 on a nicer shirt
$30 on a dress or a pair of pants

For the Bear, I try to spend:

$5 or less on casual shirts and shorts
$10 or less on pants or formal shirts

For Stinkerbell, I try to spend:

$5 or less on casual shirts and bottoms
$10 or less on play dresses
$15 or less on fancy dresses

For DH, I try to spend:

$25 or less on work shirts
$35 or less on slacks

With these limits, I know to go straight to the sale racks at the right times of the year, and I simply pass over things too far above my budget. If something is 50% off or 70% off, it’s only a “deal” for me if it ALSO fall under my maxes for clothes prices.

This doesn’t mean that I buy junk that will wear out. I’ve bought crappy clothes now and again–and regretted it!–but for the most part, I stick with department store brands and quality. But I do shop deals! My wardrobe has recently gotten beyond pathetic, and so I’ve had to replace much of it. I bought around 60 items and spent around $250 last month–all on name-brand clothes and averaging about 85% off on each item. So you do have to make decisions about not buying everything you like, but you don’t have to compromise quality or style if you don’t want to, nor do you have to spend so much time hunting bargains that you might as well spend the money, anyway!

And that way, you’re less likely to fall for this kind of thing.

The house got to the point where I had to either clean it or burn it down. I’ve been on vacation most of the past 4 week and insanely busy otherwise, so it got really disgraceful. Anyhow, after some deliberation, I decided to clean. Kids can make an astonishing amount of grime, I’d like to mention. Just in case anyone didn’t already know.

They promised me self-cleaning houses! Where are my self-cleaning houses? *g*

Seriously, once I’ve gotten rid of all the carpet in this house, we’ll get a Roomba for every level and maybe even a Scooba. I’m getting–much sooner than that–one of those Scrubbing Bubbles shower spray thingys, too. But those are pathetic replacement for a robotic housekeeper!

There’s a new trend in home-oriented magazines and articles to push certain upgrades as good for the environment and for your wallet because they save energy or water. I found an article on CNN.com that enthusiastically recommended replacing all your old appliances with Energy Star models and your old toilets with new 1.6 gallon models. The article claimed boldly that you’re doing your wallet, as well as Mother Earth, a favor.

Just for the heck of it, I decided to do the calculations to determine the payback time for replacing a toilet. I began with the guess that a family on well water was paying more for their water than a family on city water. Well, after two different calculations using numbers from two different sources, I turned out to be dead wrong. The *energy* cost of having a well is quite low–only about $60 a year at the most for most families. The cost of well water comes from the equipment–the well head, the pressure tank, the purification system, and the septic–and their maintenance, not from the energy used to get the water from the ground. (The extra wear and tear on this equipment because of the additional water it handles due to high-flush toilets wasn’t estimated, but it’s probably pretty negligible.)

Let’s add a second, fictitious family that has an average monthly municipal water bill of $150 a month, which is apparently possible in some desert locations and areas of California, for an annual rate of $1800. And to make it a bit more sane, let’s throw in a third, who has a modest $25/mo rate (say, in Beaumont, TX), for a yearly total of $300.

Next, I looked at data for what percentage of domestic water consumption goes to toilets when old models are used. A generous estimate is about 40%. So, you take $60*.4=$24. A high estimate for how much a family on a well will spend directly on pumping their water for flushing the toilet is $24.

The folks in California spend $720 a year flushing their toilets.
The folks in Beaumont spend $120 a year.

Each of these families toilets that use 5.5 gallons per flush. If they change to 1.6 gallon toilets, they will save a sum that is equal to their current expense * 1.6/5.5.

So the well water family will save $7.
The CA family will save $209.
The Beaumont family will save $35.

Now, if you renovate your bathroom, you are required to buy a new toilet rather than just replacing your old one in most areas if the old one doesn’t follow current guidelines. But if you are thinking of replacing a toilet yourself for purely economic reasons, consider these payback periods.

The cheapest toilets run about $70. Anything you spend beyond that you can’t justify by pointing at water savings (the cheap-o Crane toilets-in-a-box are perfectly capable now, unlike 10 years ago) but just because you want to spend more money on a toilet that you either like better or think will work better. My advice is to go with Toto or Caroma if you’re into performance, and buy Kohler only if you really like the style. And don’y say, “But look at all the money we’ll save…” You’ll save more by buying the Crane. What you spend beyond that is justified by wanting something prettier or with a super-high-tech-anti-marking coating or something like that. It’s a frill, which is fine as long as you admit it.

If there is one toilet in the house, it will take:

10 years for the savings to equal the cost for the well water family
4 months for the CA family
2 years for the Beaumont family

If there are two toilets, it will take:

20 years for the well water family
8 months for the CA family
4 years for the Beaumont family

If there are three toilets, it will take:

30 years for the well water family
1 year for the CA family
6 years for the Beaumont family

If there are four toilets, it will take:

40 years for the well water family
1.33 years for the CA family
8 years for the Beaumont family

Of course, not all toilets are used to the same degree. So while it would make financial sense to replace all four toilets in the CA house, it might be better to replace the two (out of four) most heavily used ones in the Beaumont house with a payback time of, say, six years and leave the other two alone.

What about me? Well, I have four toilets in my well-water house. Three of them will be replaced when I remodel the bathrooms they’re in–not just because I have to but because they are blue, yellow, and mustard-colored. The fourth is white and is used maybe ten times a year. I’m leaving it well enough alone!

What if you’re on a well but you want to make the very best environmental decision, rather than an economic one? Even then things get mess. You’re using very little additional energy to put that water through your pipes, and it’s very hard to quantify what, if any, damage you might possibly be doing by putting the water into a well maintained septic field. Additionally, you have to consider that a new toilet has some very definite energy and material environmental costs associated with it in its production and shipping. I’d bet that your best choice, environmentally speaking, would be to leave the toilets you have until they suffer damage. But quantifying that sort of thing will be highly individual according to the circumstances–and devilishly difficult, as well.

The Bear fell in love with opera after a short (too short, according to him) children’s presentation of Englebert Humperdinck’s Hansel und Gretel months ago. Ever since, he’s been badgering me to see more. Now that our New Mexico house has sold and we’re paying half as much into our mortgage (that’s INCLUDING the extra I’m putting in every month!), we’ve got the money to spend. So on Wednesday, I took him and the neighbor’s kid Werewolf to downtown Washington, DC, for “Cox and Box,” a Sullivan one-act operetta put on by the Victorian Lyric Opera Company.

It was really funny because this was a part of the Capital Fringe Festival, which is overall very artsy/liberal/edgy/FREE in a very (PAINFULLY, I daresay) self-aware sort of way. And here I am, bringing two small children into a box office which is giving out tickets for things like “7 1/2 Habits of a Highly Effective Mistress” (a one-woman show by a former callgirl!) and “The Sticking Place”, which features “bloodplay, thrill killing, and twisted sexual politics.” The folks working the counter got more than a leeetle uncomfortable before we said what show we were here to see–challenged their “open-mindedness” more than they probably thought it could be challenged. Heh. I so wanted to say “Four to see The Naked Party, please,” (with on stage nudity, of course!) but I behaved myself and let the *oh*-so-rebelliously tattoo’d and nosering’d employees (”rebellious” as only upper middle class white kids CAN be “rebellious”) give us our musical theater tickets without harassing them too much.

Okay. I’m being unfair. There were also some members of the we-wanted-to-be-hippies-but-were-born-10-to-20-years-too-late and-so-we-went-to-Wellesley-instead crowd working there, too. It’s been a long time since I’ve been around people trying so HARD to be cool.

The operetta’s staging was minimal, but the acting was brisk, the energy high, and the singing fun. The boys had a great time, but Werewolf got restless near the end, so that means “yes” to Cinderella for him (a shortened translation of Rossini’s Italian opera for kids) but “no” to the rest of the works we’re going to hit this year.

Today, I hauled the Bear along to Shakespeare in the Park–”Merry Wives of Windsor” was being put on, and it was really a great production. The Bear started to get restless near the end–but since we started with a 45-minute youth play and Merry Wives had a 2.5-hr running time, it was no wonder! I realized that this was going on just last week, and so I didn’t have time to pick up a Shakespeare for Children sort of retelling for the Bear, so he enjoyed it less than he would have if he’d better understood what was going on. He was *most* confused by the crossdressing, though–a lot of male parts were played by females, and he had a hard time keeping track of who was supposed to be a man and who a woman! Still, overall, he had a very good time–even though it wasn’t opera.

Next up is The Mikado in August, followed by Don Giovanni in September. I’m not so sure how DG will go for me, at least–it’s a tarted/moderned-up translation, and I tend to like my operas in their original language, not because I think the librettos are great art or anything but mainly because the music is meant to go with the syllables and sounds of the original language. I hope I like it, though! As far as The Bear goes, I hope it’s not TOO racy.

There are no fewer than 12 different groups within driving range that produce either opera (10 groups) or operettas/older musical theater (2 groups). Since I’m staying away from the “everyone dies” operas, we’re left with maybe a third to a fifth of all the productions that the Bear might like, so having that many to choose from is a boon! I’m trying to schedule one a month, which is enough for any five-year-old, I should think!

DH came and enjoyed himself with Cox and Box and Merry Wives, and he’s coming to Mikado, but he’s going to opt out of most of the operas. If I can get the $25 tickets to Turandot (put on by the Washington National Opera Co.), I think I’m dragging him along, too, to see if he’ll enjoy it. Puccini’s as accessible as you get, and Turandot will be GORGEOUS.

I still don’t really get why opera’s considered an upscale entertainment (versus, say, a rock concert–same price). I mean, they were mass entertainment in Italy for centuries, and the ridiculous story lines and outrageous settings and the like show it. They’re the Hollywood blockbusters of previous centuries crashing at high speed with a soap opera (there’e a reason it’s called soap OPERA!). They just happen to also be completely self-indulgent sybaritic aesthetic experiences, too. Oh, and an excuse to get terribly soppy over silly things. Instead, they have a stuffy, fat-lady reputation. :-/

I’m seriously considering a subscription to the Washington Ballet, too–kids’ version. The Bear loves dance (hmmm….I wonder why that could be?), so I think he’d love it. They’re pretty pricey, though, so I’m still deciding.

The baby is…A GIRL!

Milestones:

Ultrasound, 13 weeks: Sucking thumb!
14 weeks: First flutter
18 weeks: Could feel kicking consistently
Before 20 weeks: Responded to my speech
22 weeks: Got a great startle reflex when I accidentally scared the snot out of her with a loud noise

Right now, she seems to be trying to make an addition to her “home” though much vigorous pushing. This one doesn’t sleep nearly as much as the Bear did, so I’m already a bit afraid that this is going to be my Baby From Hell. (The Bear, at three hours old, figured out there was a difference between being held and not being held and screamed hysterically until he was 6 months old just about every time I set him down, but as long as he was being held, he was a pretty happy-go-lucky fellow. This one’s already got some EXTRA spunk that I’m afraid of… I was going to be a Great Mother and teach my baby to sign. Well, with the Bear, it was impossible because you have to have a free hand for that, and I never did! :-P)

Her Official Blog Name is Stinkerbell because I am a terrible mother.

The Bear is thoroughly disgusted with the fact that he’s having a sister, and when he found out, he tried to convince the sonographer that she just wasn’t looking hard enough and there has to e a boy in there, too. He’s coming to be reconciled with the idea, though.

The Bear is, of course, still tiny. 3rd percentile in height. While all my side of the family is very small until high school, we catch up, but I’m hoping he’s not channeling the genetics of some of the tiniest Chinese relatives! It’s tough to be REALLY short as a man. Then again, it might slow him down a little in the Mac Daddy department, which at this rate would be a good thing.

The insane thing that I’m going to try with this baby is…Infant Potty Training! Yeah, I can hear you laughing now… My mom sure is. But it might work!

The Bear saw DH’s parents recently. They wanted to give him a present, and I suggested the Identiflyer. They gave me money for it, and it came in–and it’s a huge hit! I tossed in a bit more money so he could get three song cards, too, so he has YardBirds one and two, Eastern YardBirds, Woodpeckers, and Thrushes.

YES< I am still here.

YES, everything with the baby is fine.

And YES, I will be posting again.

To usher in the momentous event, I am posting this deeply thoughtful and moving link: 20 Baby Products Great for Traumatizing Your Baby

I had a sonogram this week, too! It’s so much bigger! Beautiful. EDD: 28th of October. HR: 180 BPM. Gender: Unknown, as yet. Anout 75% of people are swearing a girl, but I think most are just saying that because I already have a boy!

I’ve got the nausea and some of the vomiting. Gum works well for me.

I want two new baby products this time around: a Moby wrap and a high chair. I want the Moby wrap because this time around, I’ve GOT to have use of my arms! A sling caused my back to go into spasms, and this is supposed to be better. I love baby-wearing. It’s the easiest and least troublesome way of taking care of a baby. It keeps baby happy, and happy babies don’t cry. *g* I want the high chair because there’s no way I’m letting a baby eat at the good dining room table, and the kitchen table got moved to the covered porch because there isn’t room in the new house. (Downsizing!)

My whacko, granola-crunching thing to try this time around? Infant potty training, AKA elimination communication. Yeah. So you’ll all be laughing your heads off at me as I’m holding my newborn over a toilet and going “Pssss!” in the vain hope that it will do something other than blink at me in confusion. But I shall not be ashamed! If it makes me miss the knock-down, drag-out potty training fight the Bear and I had (which involved defiance-peeing, I kid you not), it’ll be worth it. Never mind the months of changing diapers long after the kid was perfectly able to use the potty if he so chose…. (He had–well, has–a phobia of plumbing, which made it worse. That’s right. My kid’s scared of plumbing. Other kids are scared of monsters, but no, not mine. First time I let the water out in the tub while he was in it, he began screaming in terror. It went on from there.)

I am, however, obscenely busy. I finished line edits, I’m finishing another non-LJ book, I’m working on the next LJ book, and….we’re homeschooling fulltime. Tada!

The Bear is reading his first 6th-grade-level chapter book right now. Too cool! The Lexile Level is 920L. The mid-year interquartile range (that is, actual reading levels of students in the 25th to 75th %ile) for 10th grade in the US is 905L to 1195L. Even though some of it is over his head, he’s stumbling over only 1-3 words a page. So that means my 5-year, 2-month old can read better than a good quarter of 10th graders at Christmas, in grade level if not reading speed. (He real reading ability level is probably even with the dead middle of sixth graders at Christmas, or more compatible with texts at a late 5th grade/early 6th grade level.)

That really is terrifying because he truly can’t read all that well, abysmal speed aside. What the heck are we doing to kids in school? The funny thing is that in actual literacy levels, the US does quite well internationally in both the 4th and 8th grade. In alliteracy, though, we’re appalling.

If DH would rent another RPG, his reading level would jump up at least another grade level. Sad, but true. The Bear is addicted to watching DH play RPGs. He watched most of Mass Effect (except for two particular scenes in which he was whisked from the room, *ahem*), and he loves reading the subtitles to all the speech. DH plays as a good guy 98% of the time, so there’s not much of the naughty stuff to see, anyway–the Bear wouldn’t tolerate him being mean, anyhow!

Reading speed is still agony here. It’s not just the words per minute that’s killing me. No, it’s actually mainly the total time he takes to read a given passage, including discussing things and drinks of water and the like. With this book, we’re sitting around 20 WPM as a gross rate. That is please-kill-me-now-and-end-the-agony slow. His rate depends upon font size and reading difficulty. It can be well over 100–more like 130–for a super easy book with large font that he’s reading for his own entertainment. It’s the pauses, though, that get me the most. He stops dead, goes silent, and looks at the page–typically not the part he’s supposed to be reading–before picking up again. And I still can’t get him to reliably see small words, especially when there are many together. He tends to miss them entirely. Ah, the joys of dyslexia. I wish I could help him more, but all I can really think to do is more practice. *sighs* But improvement is so slow. The kind of ability that the Bear has to read complicated words at first sight, and then his problems with seeing *word divisions,* for goodness sake…the combinations of strength and weakness somehow seem just wrong! But we shall persevere, and all that. After this hard book, we’ll hit picture books for a while (of varying levels) and then try some super-easy chapter books in quick succession and see if we can’t get the fluency up at the harder levels. Right now, working on his spelling will, I think, help him “see” all the letters quite a bit better, too, as he’s started to ask me questions about the differences in spelling between similar words.

(And yes, of course we’ve always done phonics instruction!)

This month, there will be a feature on SHADOWS on their site. It will have an excerpt, an interview, and a guest blog on March 10th.

Too cool!